song of the moment: “take me away” lifehouse. acoustic version, of course.
Sometimes songwriters seem to articulate my thoughts better than I can. Today is one of those sometimes.
Resonating with the desire for an escape, the need for another, and an ardent attempt at honesty hindered by moments of speechlessness, the ever-sweet jason wade captures my current predicament fairly accurately.
I’ve seen it all, it was never enough
it keeps leaving me needing you.
take me away, take me away
I’ve got nothing left to say
just take me away.
I’m being reminded of my smallness, of my futility, and that challenges surface to remind us that what is truly good does not come easy, what gives us joy also brings pain, those whom we love may invoke hurt, the presence of vulnerability welcomes fear.
In hopes to escape the melancholy for a bit, I turned on the t.v. after coming home from work while I did some things around my apartment. Instead of a bit of solace, I found myself watching the “fairy tale” dream come true in the storyline. Luke builds Lorelai an ice rink in her yard (oh yes, gilmore girls.). He digs her car out of the snow. He says, “when you said you were fine this morning, you weren’t really fine. I could tell in your voice, your face.” I don’t think I’ve come across a Gilmore Girls watcher who hasn’t admired the wonderfully crafted character of Luke Danes. But that’s all he is, a crafted character, his own “prince charming” of sorts.
We dwell in a world that bombards us with visions of how we should live, what should happen in our lives, and how we should appear. Life is not “happily ever after” – at least not exclusively. Each Disney princess had her own mountains to climb and evil step-mothers to conquer. And so do we.
Sometimes I want the fairy tale, the ice rink in the yard, the library full of books (can you tell my favorite Disney leading-lady was Belle?). But right now, I’m reminding myself that life is better not a fairy tale. For fairies are a creature of the imagination and a tale is fictitious. My life will not fulfill the fairy tale framework; instead, it follows a different plot line, and I have been cast in the lead role. The show must go on. My ever after will come, with happiness that is sweet and sacred interrupted by melodious interludes of trials and sorrow, scripted in a way that I could never have imagined.
Look at the nations and watch – and be utterly amazed. For I am going to do something in your days that you would not believe, even if you were told. Habakkuk 1:5