I hate saying goodbye to the people I love. I’ve had a heavy feeling this week because I knew I’d be saying goodbye to a dear friend this morning. She was the first close girlfriend I’ve encountered here in Pensacola…one who things clicked with naturally, a kindred spirit. Our friendship was effortless. I was so thankful to have someone who understood what it’s like to be in love with a military man and the hardship this life brings. And now I’ve shipped her back to Minnesota so she can finish grad school and save the world. I miss her already.
I’ve been the owner of a lonely heart during my most of my days in Pensacola. As with all moves and transitions, some relationships have faded as our face-to-face interactions have dwindled since I am hundreds of miles away from many people that I love. But thankfully, there are also the precious few whose strength and resilience has astounded me. Perhaps some people are only brought into our lives for a season. But I can’t help but miss old friends and the comfort and love I experienced in those relationships.
I don’t regret the life I’ve chosen or the moves I’ve made. I am so thankful to be married to a man I love, admire and respect. I strive to support him in every way I can, to pursue this dream alongside him. But it has been so incredibly hard to be away from the friends and family who have greatly enriched my life. It is daunting to realize how many miles are between me and the safe places I want to run to on those dark days. I’m still trying to cultivate those safe places in Pensacola. It hasn’t come easy.
Of course, mornings like this one are a reminder that goodbyes are an inherent part of Navy life. Between duty station transfers and deployments, I’ll be saying more goodbyes than I’d like. Hopefully a fair number of reunions will be mixed in as well. Life is made sweeter by good company.
Alright. Time to pick myself up by the bootstraps and get on with this day.